"it goes so fast."
These two phrases I heard over and over from new parents. But wow,
sometimes it just hits you hard - you have no control over time. Your
baby grows exponentially. There is no freeze frame - or is there?
Penguin is 12 weeks, 3 days old. If my calendering is correct, he was
conceived today one year ago. A year has never brought about so much
change in my life! Weeks and days have never been so precious and so
quick to go. This week has been an especially powerful reminder.
On Sunday, he rolled over from tummy to back for the first time.
Monday was his first stroller ride without using the carseat
attached. Monday night was the first time he went to sleep within
five minutes of laying him down to bed (kudos to Elizabeth Pantley's
No Cry Sleep Solution). Tuesday was the second night he went right to
sleep -- and that is how it goes. The first time blends into the
second, third, thirtieth time. Suddenly he fusses not because he is
wet or hungry, but because he wants to practice standing! He'll coo
and converse. He anticipates the "up" in "up/down" practice. It is
quite a change from the newborn of a few short weeks ago.
I'm torn between feeling guilty that I haven't documented enough of
what he's done or take enough pictures and feeling shallow for taking
time to document and observe instead of immersing myself fully in the
moments with him. Memories are fleeting. Taking the time to write
while they are authentic and fresh preseves the thought for
longer...but does it lose something in the translation? I like my
strawberries organic, fresh picked...not frozen...though it is nice to
have the taste, it isn't quite the same later on.
Is it the same then with my son? How do I find the balance between
collecting moments to keep for myself when he is away at college, and
taking my yogic stance of just being in the moment
Where do you fall? Time machine? Or time trap?
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